Moments of immense friction are unavoidable. In fact, they’re integral aspects of the journey. We mustn’t indulge our aversions to this pain, but feel them wholly. The cracked fragments of our ego aren’t some cancer to cut out of our chests. They’re just as valid to the whole, as any other part is, so embrace the shards; arms extended. Give that pain some love, as it calls out to be seen. Validate the friction, feel it cool. We’re obligated to nourish it, it’s how we learn, lest we allow it to corrode our vision, like so many before us.
So, I urge you to walk towards the fear, the doubt, the immense boredom of being one’s self. Allow it all to exist, like the quick witted lovers they are, and life will begin to soften. Your path will shape shift so suddenly, you’re no longer caught in a losing fight with the rippling reflections of your ego. Instead, you’re just dancing between moments together, surfing the highs and lows; it’s all effortless, but we act as if it’s an impassible ascent.
Remind yourself, always to live within the embrace. It’ll come about spontaneously and everything you’ve hated so deeply will be forgiven. No apologies necessary, because your life, your journey, it fits perfectly into place. You’ll see why it’s there. Why this happened, why that didn’t, but it won’t shake you. You’ve surrender to this truth now, so the perceived responsibility to uphold some mask just falls away. We can finally love ourselves, unconditionally. The scars we once hid become beautiful, we expose them for all to see. They’re nothing; only love.
Some will say it’s ridiculous. Some will say it isn’t practical, but follow the glow of that eternal beacon. It’s your inner truth and no matter how faint it seems, flowers, more brilliant than you can imagine, will blossom with every step along that path.
Simply put, your pain in walking this journey is the mirrored reflection of your own capacity to love. You’ll come to turn adversity into the fuel that pushes your trajectory onward; it’ll be your dynamo.
Feeling so deeply, in every direction, is a gift; be grateful you can. Don’t feel shame for your intensity, don’t feel shame for asking more of yourself, just continue the process of expansion.
One day, and I assure you it will come, a glimpse of the divine will make itself seen. It’ll all rest in your cupped hands: love, faith, magic. It’s always been there, awaiting your arrival. You’re just now ready see it. You’re able to drink it in. On that day, separation will no longer exist.
You’ll come to know yourselves through the whole, the other, and vice versa. It’ll shatter the physical plane you’ve been bound to, so you can come to smile within one another. You’ll realize that’s the only thing that’s ever been.
So when you take that leap, and oh you will, we’ll be here ready for your embrace.
A twisted hand with half gnawed fingernails, sporting blood raw cuticles, clutched the stainless steel handrail next to my seat. It belonged to a woman of a hard fifty years. She was balding, missing most of the body in her hair, much like what a little girl’s doll becomes after years of abuse, and her scalp shown through.